Empath 101 - Learning Curve
In the beginning, simply paying attention to sudden thoughts & emotions, and following the signs (questions and instincts) was enough to finally see what I’m capable of. As I began to speak up more, not only did I find I was I getting reassurance on my suspicions, but also that those with personal issues would immediately open up to me. I naturally counsel as I’ve already felt their mood and have some insight as to what it is and how to comfort/remedy it; following through with this action has given me further reassurance in my ability. With practicing all of this over time I suddenly realized that not only was I able to control it, I was also finally confident that I am my genuine self.
If you’re not sure how to do this, I can suggest a simple tactic that’s taken right from my INFJ ways: question and investigate everything. As I did my initial research on what it is to be an empath, I started to sift through my life experiences and saw where others’ emotions and misguidance determined how I felt (about myself) because I didn’t know better. One of the best ways that I now describe it is that I thought it was normal to “know” others’ thoughts and moods, but not knowing why/what that was caused me to suffer and turn in on myself for many years. So at first I started small, simply keeping to a small group of people I was comfortable with in which I could openly speak. Every time I had a thought or felt an emotion that didn’t register as my own immediate focus or concern, I turned to whoever was in my surroundings and talked to them about it – there was rarely a time I wasn’t able to determine what came from who.
It sounds forward and possibly a bit ridiculous (depending on your approach and who you have to work with, mostly), but I can assure you that’s the best way to learn your capabilities for yourself and get affirmation. Having said all that though, there is a cautionary area (“filter”) that I did want to talk about. One too many times now, I’ve dealt with a situation in which I was the recipient of life-altering news that (in all honesty) actually didn’t surprise me and reaffirmed past suspicions. Obviously, I did not reveal any of my thoughts at any point in time; this can be a bit of a burden to carry when it involves those closest to you. The reason? We need to know when not to share certain things, simply because it would be so critical that actual evidence would be the only grounds to do it.
In part, I tend not to reveal these thoughts for more than that reason though: in a way, I also question the (current) validity of it. While time and time again I find most of my unwanted suspicions come true, I also hold onto that sliver of hope that circumstances could change and it wouldn’t be true. Anyone that provides readings likely agrees with me on this: the sometimes over-looked fact is that no matter what answers we provide, there’s always a chance that a split-second decision in a different direction can change the outcome (answer) completely. Knowing this is true about everything in life, is the real reason why I hold back some of the worst thoughts that I have had. And let’s not even get started on the fact of seeing things that could be, but aren’t acted upon!
With all that being said, I mostly carry this filter with those I care for – unless, of course, their life is in danger. Anytime I have done a reading for someone (no matter their relationship to me), I allow my thoughts to be relayed as I hear them and I don’t censor my final interpretation. I mention this because what I’ve written above does not make sense if you’re trying to make a reputable career doing such… but may still apply in some parts of life. While not the same “filter”, I also have a method for when I’m in crowded places such as the mall, busy stores, or a concert – without doing that, I would “suffer the consequences” of many people. This is your more important weapon, and is what most refer to as Protection or Grounding. There are many methods to be found online and it is something you can learn to do in your own style within a few minutes.
One of the biggest, and most important, lessons I learned early on was to let go of everything I encounter. Carrying such thoughts (such as those unspeakable messages), and having such conversations can take a toll on our energy. Aside from solitude, I began practicing Etheric Cord Cleansing at the end of the day. If you’re unfamiliar with this Cleansing, it’s very simple and is something that only needs a few minutes (you can find many examples online – there’s no one right way; similar to Protection/Grounding). Regardless of what works best for you, the one thing you want to adapt to quickly is learning to listen to your body. Your body (usually) gives you the first indicator of anything that’s wrong, but it’s our ability to recognize and react to it that results in the ultimate outcome.
While important no matter who you are and why, listening to your body helps to add context and help you to get to know yourself. Aside from feeling the emotions and state of someone near you, your body has it’s own way of telling you what to do. Whether it’s your natural reaction to the truth of a person’s thoughts or conversation, speaking the words that you feel and wonder if you should say, or simply your own need to seek safe space and time, your body gives you the indicators you need. After recognizing the cues and identifying them over a period of time, you will be able to develop (and likely even surprise) yourself!
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